今天是4月1日愚人節，英國幾家頗具“愚”樂精神的報紙紛紛炮制猛料，讓不少讀者大跌眼鏡。《獨立報》稱皇馬球星C羅已與葡萄牙財政部達成協議，愿意加入西班牙隊以抵償葡國1.6億歐元的債務。《鏡報》則稱英國政府將對空氣征稅，凡是空氣新鮮的城市均需繳稅，而倫敦、曼徹斯特等污染嚴重的城市將獲得減免。該報還煞有介事地“引用”一位環保技術人員的話說：“空氣和水一樣是有限的資源，我們需要合理利用。”

According to the Independent broadsheet, Real Madrid winger Ronaldo has agreed to "act like a patriot" and defect to the Spanish national team, netting his debt-ravaged country 160 million euros (227 million dollars).

Portugal football star Cristiano Ronaldo is to join Spain to help ease his nation's debt crisis and Britain is to begin taxing fresh air, British newspapers reported in their April Fools' Day editions.

According to the Independent broadsheet, Real Madrid winger Ronaldo has agreed to "act like a patriot" and defect to the Spanish national team, netting his debt-ravaged country 160 million euros (227 million dollars).

"Weighed down by debt...Portugal's finance ministry has secured the co-operation of football's highest-paid player in an audacious bid to draw the nation back from the brink of economic collapse," claimed the paper's lead.

Mirror reporter Flora Olip, coincidentally an anagram of April fool, revealed that the British government was to introduce a "gasp" bill to raise taxes from fresh air.

"Olip" reported that the "Air Tariff Control" system would tax areas with fresher air while more polluted cities such as London and Manchester would be due for a rebate.

The paper "cited" a senior Environment Agency technician as saying: "Air is natural but, just like water, it is a finite resource that we have to manage sensibly".

A Labour lawmaker was apparently shocked, admitting it had "literally taken his breath away".

The Daily Express joined in the fun, reporting that a British company had developed a modified Zimmer walking frame which incorporated a skateboard for pensioners who wanted something "a little more speedy".

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(Agencies)

（中國日報網英語點津 Helen 編輯）